Fairness is overrated.

So…long time to talk, peeps.  I, and I’m sure most you, have been crazy busy with the start of the school year and all the schedules and sports and chauffeuring and crap that goes along with this time of year.  Plus, I have taken on another job!  Technically, that makes four now…but, hey…who’s counting?


So, yeah…busy times.  And not a drop of creative juices left to write smart, witty, little blog posts to make you chuckle.  Apologies.


But, there was a recent incident that I must share:  Just last Saturday, we were in Dallas at my youngest daughter’s soccer game when after the game a mother from the opposing team took me, and a few other parents, to task over the fact that our team played all 11 players against their team’s reduced numbers (9 in the first half, 10 in the second).


Let me set the stage for you:  First, these girls are U13/U14 bracket which means they are all 12 & 13 years old and this is basically that last age bracket before they hit high school.  So, that’s important.  Because these girls are not 8 anymore.  Also, we play 11 v 11 at this age.  In fact, I think they’ve played 11 v 11 since they were U10’s.  So, again, this is not something new.


And one more detail:  we beat them 7-2.  They were good players, it was only 2-1 at the half, and our girls looked a little sluggish during the opening part of the game.  But then in the second half they got tired and our girls were actually playing like they knew what they were doing.  So, yes…we won by a good margin.  That happens sometimes.  You know how I know that?  Because Kate’s team actually played an entire season with only 9 girls on a roster before.  Yeah…no shit.  And you know what?  They lost games.  Sometimes it was an even bigger point spread.  And you know what else?  I can remember only one time that the other team dumbed down the number of players to match ours…it’s just not done.  If you don’t show up with the right number of girls, you better be prepared to play your asses off.  Here’s the thing…sometimes they managed to win.  And those wins meant more than any of the others.


So, back to the soccer sideline…as the game is ending and people are packing chairs, this mom turns to us and asks if we have good communication with our coach.  Seemed like kind of weird question to me, I figured she was going to say something about not having good communication with their coach and that’s why they didn’t have enough girls show up.  But no…this chick takes a left turn with the conversation and then says “did you know that he played all 11 girls against our 9 for the entire first half?”  Clearly she was looking for some kind of shock, indignation, or maybe just a nod?  Clearly, she had not met any of us prior to this conversation.  We just looked at her and said “Um…yes.”  Now she was mildly curfuffled.  “Well, don’t you think that sends a wrong message to the girls, that it’s bad sportsmanship?”  Again, met with some blank stared from the Silverton crowd.  “But, you don’t seem to care…” she said after taking in our unimpressed facial expressions.  Bingo!  Give the idiot a prize!  One of the other moms pointed out to her that we’ve been on the other end of the equation before, explaining the season I just told you about.  But this woman wasn’t listening…she kept making comments about how Silverton would get a reputation as poor sportsmanship and yada yada yada….I don’t know, it was all an annoying, whiney, mishmash of words.   Finally, she said “Well, I think it would be nice if the coach would play the same number of girls because don’t you think it would teach the girls about good sportsmanship?”  That was it…her yapping finally got to me.  “No, it teaches the girls on the short team to be tough, that’s what it teaches.”  To which she responded with “Well, it should just be fair.”  Oh.  My.  God.  I wanted to go off on this chick…really.  Like I wanted to fucking unload on this stupid, stupid woman and her ridiculous notions of fairness.  Instead, I just said, “Yes, and everyone should get participation medals and ice cream.”


Seriously….life isn’t fair.  And too many people, adults and teenagers alike, are walking around out there thinking society, and the world in general, owes them ‘fair’ treatment and an ‘even playing field’ and whatever else they feel entitled too.  And in related news, there are a whole bunch of people out there who can’t figure out why their lives aren’t what they thought it would be.  Sports aren’t always fair….life isn’t always fair….marriage isn’t always fair…being a parent is rarely ever fair.  Put away that notion and learn to cope, people!  If you cannot handle losing a soccer game then you are sorely prepared for the world at large.


There, that’s all the creativity, cursing, and time I have for this little post.  But, it’s kind of rejuvenated the writing bug so perhaps the next post won’t be weeks and weeks away.  I shall leave you this that little nugget of hope.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *